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Asheville Salt Cave

Healthy boundaries are this summer’s hottest accessory

Here is how to consciously uncouple yourself from commitments that do not serve you

Mamie
Posted on May 6, 2019.

Written by Mamie


Summer is almost here and so are those evites for barbecues and requests for your time.  Here is how to consciously uncouple yourself from commitments that do not serve you:

Tip #1:

When you first get invited to something, think about if you would want to go that same day.  If not, then you probably won’t want to go in two weeks.  It’s easy to think that in the near future, your life will have magically released your stress and you will feel like attending.  Hopefully this won’t come as a shock, but you physically cannot be everywhere at one given time and you cannot be there for everyone in every possible way.  This reality may make you feel like a flake. However, there is a difference between a flake and a real live human being.  A way to get started on alleviating guilt and only showing up for meaningful occasions is to make yourself do whatever it is that you say “yes” to.  Nothing will help you say “no, thank you” down the line more than driving to Ohio for a baby shower on a gorgeous sunny Sunday morning.

Tip #2:  

Your generosity is a precious resource that will run out if you don’t put some healthy boundaries around it.  You can spread your charitable care further if you are selective and intentional about every dollar you donate or every hour you volunteer.  Take a good look at your budget and your calendar to decide what feels like a healthy amount of your time and your money to give away.  Nonprofits typically will prefer to have a monthly donor than a one time donation.  Find a nonprofit that is doing work that is closest to your heart and set up a monthly auto pay amount that feels comfortable to your budget.  With volunteering, be just as consistent with one local nonprofit.  Find a volunteer gig that gives back to your community in a meaningful way that doesn’t leave you feeling depleted or depressed.  There are hundreds of opportunities right in your town that need your wisdom and strength in ways that will restore your community and your soul.

Tip #3:  

Schedule time where you will not do anything.  That blank spot on your calendar for Thursday evening?  Write in a word that will remind you that you are to only rest and rejuvenate at that time.  We too easily equate busyness with success. However, when you slow down and spend a whole evening reading or taking a leisurely walk without an end goal, you will become more and more connected with your higher purpose.

If you can’t quite commit to doing nothing just yet, schedule yourself a salt cave session at Asheville Salt Cave.  Our staff will hold you accountable by locking away your electronics and guiding you into a relaxed state.

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